Boyfriend cheated on me four years ago, i still don't trust him?

My wife has cheated on me, I am still working at it. I am pretty much the same as you, get attention but don't act on it as I love my wife and wouldn't want to lose her. But now I keep thinking maybe I deserve better, but fear I will probably just get cheated on again anyway. It's really hard, My heart says one thing and my head another. I like to beleive that she wouldn't do it again, but I only have one life and am scared that if she does it again that I will be wasting a part of my life believing in her, But then again I married her so she has got to be worth fighting for. You have to decide if its worth it. Good luck!